Foremost, to begin I have my own set of experiences,
in light of the double standard, that derive on a daily basis. I am the
youngest of four and the only girl; not to mention my Latin heritage that
magnifies these experiences that much more—I’ll get to that in just a second.
In a more broad sense, women experience double
standards in their everyday life- the way women dress, the way they react to
any given situation, and how we behave is perceived in a stereotypical way.
Let’s look at hooking up for instance, men are judgmental of women who have
casual sex (as if men aren’t having sex with women who are also engaging in
casual sex). According to a study conducted by the Demographic Research, The Sexual Double Standard and Gender
Differences in Attitudes Toward Casual Sex Among U.S. University Students
69% of men said they respect a woman less if she hooks up or has sex with lots
of people, but only 37% feel this way about men who do the same. I’ll leave
that there for you to think of it what you will.
On a different but paralleled note, although both
sexes experience fat prejudice, women are judged harsher for being overweight
because the ideals and societal expectations are overstated wherever we
go—magazines, commercials, social media—you name it. A woman is expected to “live up” to her body,
like have children because that’s what our bodies are for. As if our intellect
and career goals should fall below that just
have babies! And if you don’t then you’re selfish. The Huffington post
adds, “Children free women are often referred to as selfish and told they will
regret the decision… because what kind of unnatural woman would never want to
be a woman?” On the opposing side, men who decide to not have children aren’t
told they are less of a man because being a father isn’t “considered to be an
essential part of manhood.”
The double standard zooms in to the way we behave—if
I come off as “bossy” best believe my “image” is perceived as undesirable
whereas as man can possibly come off as being attractive because he is “in
control.” I face this on a daily basis at home. “Brenda, why are you so upset?
Why are you so angry? Just do as you’re told and work harder.” In my heritage
men are to be served and any woman who questions him, or anything else really,
is not a lady—just do what you’re told and move on—don’t be an inconvenience. I
could describe Latin culture as including a lot of double standards and from
childhood we’re imposed with these ideas that women are merely “less” and we
shouldn’t change the world or the way things are but that we need to be changed and molded to what the world expects from us.
The lights are dim and she exasperates, “my experience with double standards?
Damn.” Alexia Pineda, a soon to be UCLA grad student, takes a deep breath,
“we’re imposed with this idea of being strong because the world won’t take a
woman seriously. We’re taught to meekly follow without question because if we
challenge it, we are ‘too difficult’ and ‘too emotional’ and who wants that?”
I feel as though I am constantly swimming against
the current and as I get older the waves are getting bigger and more constant.
Sometimes I just want to let myself wash to shore and lay on the sand but a
part of me would never allow that. We
cannot allow it. Keep being bossy because bossy gets things done. Keep pushing.
Keep doing you.
No comments:
Post a Comment