Why You Don’t Want To Be Prescribed Adderall

 

Attention Deficit Disorder (ADD) isn’t all that it’s cracked up to be. As I’m writing this, I can feel my concentration slipping. Noises have become enticing, like the constant tapping on my keyboard. I feel distanced from my phone, and every time someone walks by me in the library, I turn around to see if it’s someone I know. My extended release Adderall is starting to wear off and my brain is starting to relax back to its natural state. My ADD is climbing out from underneath the blanket of focus I had for 10 hours today.  

            According to drugs.com, “Extended release Adderall releases half the medication instantly and the second half is released in slower dissolving capsules.” It gives the person focus throughout the day instead of Adderall that instantly releases the medication and wears off after about four to six hours. ADD is not something you want to have. Sure, we get prescribed the precious Adderall so many people want, but at what cost? Let me put this in context for you. You know when you’re at the library and there’s one, really loud girl talking on the phone? The girl that for some reason thinks it’s okay to have a full-fledged conversation with her mom about her boyfriend in the middle of the third floor of the quiet section. The girl that’s talking so loud that it’s all you can think about, occupying all of your focus. Well, that’s what every single person in the room is like when you have ADD. Distractions that are easy to ignore to someone without ADD are intensified, and instead of focusing on the task at hand, I’m listening to the girl three seats down from me, eating her salt and pepper kettle chips.

            What almost everyone that asks me for my Adderall doesn’t understand is that I take Adderall to focus how you would normally. When you take my Adderall, you feel like you can solve the world’s problems. You can bang out an entire project in one night. You can cram for an entire exam fueled by this surge of motivation that seems super-hero-like. You take my Adderall and ask me, “Is this how you feel all the time?” Unfortunately, my answer is no. I’ll never feel like a limitless mastermind. When I take it, I become a normal human being. I can finish a normal amount of work, in a normal amount of time.

            My brain works in two modes: on Adderall, and off Adderall. On Adderall, I’m attentive, motivated and energetic. Off Adderall, I can barely get up the motivation and focus to clean my room or send an email. According to Additudemag.org, “Brain imaging studies using PET scanners show that brain metabolism in children with ADD is lower in areas of the brain that control attention, judgment, and reason.” It frustrates me that this is how my brain operates- scattered, spastic, and very unorganized.

            Having ADD isn’t a free pass to get super-pills; it means you have a disability. I take Adderall, and I didn’t have a say in it. Emily a junior at Loyola Marymount University who also suffers from ADD said, “The worst thing you can say to anyone with ADD is, ‘I think I should start taking Adderall.’ ” I was diagnosed with ADD my freshman year of college. After I was diagnosed I was told, “This is something you’re going to have to take for the rest of your life.” When the late night assignments are over, and we’re all out in the real world, I’m still going to be taking Adderall. When I’m raising a family and have to take the right kid to the right place for soccer practice, I’m still going to be taking Adderall. When I’m trying to remember the numbers they just said for bingo at my nursing home, I’ll probably still be taking Adderall.

            So you tell me you’re jealous that I get prescribed Adderall? Don’t be. I’m jealous that you can drink a cup of coffee and motivate yourself once you lose focus. I’m jealous that the success of your day doesn’t depend on whether or not you took a pill that morning. So, before you say you want to be prescribed to Adderall, ask yourself if you need and want to operate in two different modes. Ask yourself if you want to rely on medicine to make your entire life work. If I had a choice, I would choose coffee like the rest of the world.